Calvin - Number Games

A Poem...

My First Time

The sky was dark
The moon was high
All alone just she and I.

Her hair was soft
Her eyes were blue
I knew just what she wanted to do.

Her skin so soft
Her legs so fine
I ran my fingers down her spine.

I didn't know how
But I tried my best
I started by placing my hands on her breast.

I remember my fear my fast beating heart
But slowly she spread her legs apart
And when I did it I felt no shame.

All at once the white stuff came
At last it's finished it's all over now
My first time ever at milking a cow.....

Bite It...

A guy walking down the street sees a woman with perfect breasts. He says to her, "Hey miss, would you let me bite your breasts for $100 dollars?

"Are you nuts? !!" she replies, and keeps walking away. He turns around, runs around the block and gets to the corner before she does.

"Would you let me bite your breasts for $1,000 dollars?" he asks again.

"Listen you; I'm not that kind of woman! Got it?" So the guy runs around the next block and faces her again. "Would you let me bite your breasts just once for $10,000 dollars?"

She thinks about it for a while and says, "Hmmm, $10,000 dollars, eh? Ok, just once, but not here. Let's go to that dark alley over there."

So they go into the alley, where she takes off her blouse to reveal the most perfect breasts in the world. As soon as he sees them, he grabs them and starts caressing them, fondling them slowly, kissing them, licking them, burying his face in them, but not biting them.

The woman finally gets annoyed and asks, "Well? Are you gonna bite them or not?"

"Nah", he replies. "Costs too much !!!!"

Business proposal...

Johnny wanted to screw a girl in his office.....but she belonged to someone else...

One day Johnny got so frustrated that he went up to her and said I'll give you a 1000 dollars if you let me screw you....but the girl said NO.

Johnny said I'll be fast, I'll throw the money on the floor, you bend down, I'll be finished by the time you pick it up.

She thought for a moment and said that she would have to consult her boyfriend.....so she called her boyfriend and told him the story.

Her boyfriend says ask him for 2000 dollars, pick up the money very fast, he won't even be able to get his pants down. So she agrees and accepts the proposal.

Half an hour goes by and the boyfriend is waiting for his girlfriend to call. Finally after 45 mins the boyfriend calls and asks what happened......

She said "THE BASTARD USED COINS!!!"

Management lesson:

ALWAYS CONSIDER A BUSINESS PROPOSAL IN ITS ENTIRETY!

Logitech's new device

Good news for all those artistic minds working on Adobe's Creative Suite to create digital art. For people familiar with Adobe's Creative suite like the Photoshop, it is a a common feature to use keyboard shortcuts for common operations. But, memorizing these shortcuts is a pain staking and time consuming task. Even after years of experience you will still not remember all the shortcuts. Logitech has come up with a new device which could be a boon for all those artistic souls trying to create magic with bits and bytes. Also, it could mean more productivity and more money for the companies into the business of computer graphics. This device which can be worked on with your non-mouse using hand has buttons exclusively developed for the shortcuts.
For more info click on the links below,


http://stereoxide.wordpress.com/2006/02/23/control-freak/
http://home.businesswire.com/portal/site/google/
http://blog.wired.com/monkeybites/

Good Dog...

A man was leaving a cafe with his morning coffee when he noticed a very unusual funeral procession. A funeral coffin was followed by a second one about 50 feet behind the first. Behind the second coffin was a solitary man walking with a black dog. Behind him was a queue of 200 men walking in a single line.

The man could not stand his curiosity. He approached the man walking with the dog, "I am sorry for your loss, and i know now is a bad time to disturb you, but I've never seen a funeral like this with so many of you walking in single line. Whose funeral is it?"

The man replied "well, the first coffin is for my wife."

The inquisitive man asked "What happened to her?"

The man replied "My dog attacked and killed her."

He inquired further "Well, who is in the second coffin?"

The man answered "My mother-in-law. She was trying to help my wife when the dog attacked and killed her also."

A thoughtful moment of silence passes between the two men.

Then the first one asks in excitement "Can I borrow the dog?"

The man replied "Please join the queue."

Business Search Engine

Nothing great about this search engine, except that it is designed specifically for the purpose of searching business and finance related topics on the web. Of course not a Google beater by any stretch of imagination. But, for people who are business geeks and would not like to see their search page cluttered with non-business related stuff would enjoy the search results on this engine. Just one more innovative business idea on the web. Well, for other not so business savvy people you can skip this one. I don't have to tell you what other search engine options you have - as if you were looking for options.

Click on the link to take a look at the site,
Business Chambers